| Maggie: | Da, cum an huffa look! Colin’s posted a noo refyoo af Unca Jim’s poetry book. |
| Shuggie: | Colin who? |
| Maggie: | |
| Shuggie: | Colin wull whit? |
| Maggie: | He wullne oanyhin. |
| Shuggie: | Then why’d ye say e would? |
| Maggie: | Ah didne say e would |
| Shuggie: | Aye ye did. You said, ‘Colin wull…’ |
| Maggie: | Whit Ah meant wis tha Colin has… |
| Shuggie: | Haas? As that no a Jewish name? |
| Maggie: | His name’s no Haas, Da. At’s Wull. |
| Shuggie: | Who? |
| Maggie: | Colin. |
| Shuggie: | Colin Haas? |
| Maggie: | Naw … Wull. |
| Shuggie: | Wullie who? |
| Maggie: | Naw, tha’s his name: Wull! |
| Shuggie: | Did ye no say is name were Colin? |
| Maggie: | Ah did. |
| Shuggie: | Then is name canne be Colin af it’s Wull. |
| Maggie: | Aye it can. |
| Shuggie: | Naw, it canne. |
| Maggie: | Da, it can! |
| Shuggie: | Ah bet you’ll be tellin me next hing tha black can be white. |
| Maggie: | Ackchally… no, forget it. Tha guy’s name is Colin Wull. Wull is his last name. |
| Shuggie: | No is middle name? |
| Maggie: | Naw. |
| Shuggie: | No short fer Wulliam or oanyhin? |
| Maggie: | No, Da. |
| Shuggie: | Ah see. So whit wull Colin Wull’s wull be then? |
| Maggie: | E wulln’t oanyhin. E’s . . . whiteffer tha past tense af wulled is. |
| Shuggie: | Wulted? |
| Maggie: | Grrrrr. Jist look ere at is website. |
| Shuggie: | Oh Ah see noo. At’s a refyoo af oor Jim’s book o poeyemtry. |
| Maggie: | Ah wis tryin tae tell ye tha but ye widdne lissun. |
| Shuggie: | Wull Ah’m lissunin noo. As it oany good? |
| Maggie: | Aye, Da. Colin says: ‘This is a fine collection by a thoughtful, subtle and perceptive writer, and it deserves to be widely read.’ |
| Shuggie: | Tha’s dead nice. Tha Colin’s a nice bloke. |
| Maggie: | Ah’d huff tae agree thur, Da. |
| Shuggie: | Whit’s is bloag caw’d? |
| Maggie: | |
| Shuggie: | So e’s an Australian? Ah though e wis Jewish. |
| Maggie: | Don’t go thur, Da. |
Just ordered it, Jim. Any chance you could sign it?
ReplyDeleteThat's lovely of you, Marion, and of course I will.
ReplyDeleteBrilliant, as always. But thou knows what I think of Aggie and Shuggie.
ReplyDeleteNever disappoint.
It never ceases to amaze me how I manage to come up with these, Dave. I got the idea for this one while I was doing the dishes, came into the living room and jotted down "Who's on first" so I wouldn't forget the idea but I was back in five minutes because I couldn't keep the conversation that was brewing in my head. Not sure how long I can keep them coming but I'm not complaining. I do worry a little that not everyone realises that they're only there to point them to a book review. Perhaps what I need to do is state that explicitly in English so there's no doubt.
ReplyDelete"I do worry a little that not everyone realises that they're only there to point them to a book review. Perhaps what I need to do is state that explicitly in English so there's no doubt."
ReplyDeleteAnd you just did, Jim!
Brill review. Really pleased for you.
I was - still am - dead flattered, Rachel. Colin's been in the poetry business for years. He must have read a lot of crap in that time. Now the hard thing - to get people to read the damn thing. That's why I've kept prices down to a minimum.
ReplyDelete