Monday, 15 September 2008

Aggie and Shuggie 9



Aggie: Whur've ye bin? Ah'm freezin ma tits aff waitin fer yoo.
Maggie: Sorry, Ma. Da kept me talkin an Ah wis late fer the bus.
Aggie: Ah hope so. Jist as loang as yoo wurnae hangin aroun wi that Duggie Scoat character.
Maggie: Ah wisne.
Aggie: Wull yoo betta no. Ah wis talkin to er next door an she said she saw im doon by the gaswurks readin Roabert Ludlum.
Maggie: E widne dae that. E towd me e wis half way throo À la recherché du temps perdu.
Aggie: Aye, yer faither tawd me e wur a Proost man when we wis datin an Ah fund oot oan the hunnymoon e'd oanly feenished Swaann's Way. Ye canne trust men, hen. Anywise next door wis alsa tellin me aboot anither cupul o reviews aff yer Unca Jim's book that Ah'd nae seen
Maggie: Mair?
Aggie: Aye. Thur's wan frae Sabrina Williams. Is she no a tennis player? Whit's she daein reviewin books?
Maggie: No Ma, she's a reggae singer. Who's the utha wan?
Aggie: Sum wan cawd Nathan KP.
Maggie: Soonds lik a nut t'me.
Aggie: Noo don be flippant young lady. Ah'm shair e's a luvely man. B'side e gave Jim's book five stars.
Maggie: Five stars? Way t'go Unca Jim. Did she give yer the web addresses?
Aggie: Aye. Sabrina's site's cawd Breeni Books an Nathan's is Inkweaver. Ah've goat a note af thur addresses in ma purse. Raight, Ah cud dae wi a wee drink. Ah jist wun a tenner at the bingo an it's burnin a hole in ma poaket.
Maggie: Well Da says t'fetch him in a fish suppa oan the way hame.
Aggie: Oh, e dus dus e?
Maggie: Aye – wi two pickles.
Aggie: Well we'll see, won't we Mags?
Maggie: Jist as lang as e knows Ah passed the wurd oan.

16 comments:

  1. I smiled as I read this dialogue. You have them as your staple part of your blog. That's neat. I like the way you employ them to introduce other blogs. I have to visit Inkweaver's site to see your book. It must be a very good one for it to get a 5 star rating. I'm still waiting a visit and a comment from you at my blogsite. Hehe. Enjoyed reading this.
    Tasha

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  2. Thanks for dropping by, Tahsa, and I'm glad you get a kick out of the Aggie and Shuggie's. I was just looking for a) a fun way to direct my readers to new reviews of my book and the like and b) something I could write fairly quickly to take the pressure off the longer blogs that I keep ending up writing.

    As for commenting on your blog…Tasha, I look at so many blogs every day half the time I don't know who I've read or what I've read. If I commented on every one I'd get nothing done. That said, I'm always looking for a post where I can add a constructive comment. I can tell you your daughter's very pretty. I'm not sure that would count as constructive and I'm sure you hear that all the time but there you go.

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  3. Hi Jim,

    I don;t know if I'll mention it here or not. Thanks for the generosity. It's pretty cool on the outside. Now I'm excited about the inside as well. Can I write some posts later on about it? I would not critique because I'm not an expert on that, but I'll write a comment as a reader. Would that be okay?

    Now, I'm getting used to this Aggie and Shuggie post. I know now what they denote.

    Btw, Tasha has some good novel in her other blog, The Big Picture (http://loveandromance-tashabud.blogspot.com) and it has kept me on my toes at times.

    Cheers.

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  4. Jena, you write what you like. That's the whole point of having a blog. But now you know what Aggie and Shuggie are all about be prepared, Scottish humour can be quite boisterous and a lot of people interpret it as aggressive and of course Aggie and Shuggie are cultural stereotypes exaggerated for comic effect.

    If you want to see the role models for Aggie and Shuggie have a look at this clip from Rab C Nesbitt. Shuggie is Rab and Aggie is Mary Doll. When my wife first moved over here – she's an American BTW – she used to watch Rab C Nesbitt with a blank expression at first but little by little the humour started to seep through the accents.


    Just noticed I mistyped Tasha's name. Sorry Tasha.

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  5. LOVE it! You have no idea how many hits Breeni Books gets from people searching for Serena Williams, the tennis player. You nailed it!

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  6. Glad you liked it Sabrina. It's a very Scottish way to show affection to people, to take the Micky out of them. I'm glad you took it in the spirit in which it was intended.

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  7. I love these! But I'm a little slow. And I'm originally from Missouri, the Show-Me State. Whatever that has to do with anything. Aaaanyway, I'm confused about the family ties. Maggie calls - EUREKA! I figured it out by myself! Never mind, Jim. I was confusing you with Shuggie.

    Yes, I have been accused of dying my hair brown more than once in my lifetime. :)

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  8. Glad that Aggie and Shuggie are keeping you amused Susan. As I write more the characters are developing. I certainly never planned to do a series of these but it looks like I'm stuck with them now.

    It seemed logical to my mind to introduce a daughter, Maggie, who I see an an obnoxious teenager (Is there any other kind?) and a pet dog ('dug') who will probably never get named.

    I'm not sure what I'll do with Maggie's boyfriend, Duggie, since I've painted him as a bit of a waster but I expect he'll stay.

    I just like the idea of this most uncultured of families being into reading literature.

    As for their relationship to me... I know Maggie calls me 'Unca' (i.e. 'uncle') but in Scotland it's very common for the children in a house to call an adult family friend 'Uncle'; either way their the poor relations.

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  9. A fantastic welcome back, Jim. Thanks for that. What could be better than opening with Aggie and Shuggie? Now I have a few other sites to chase up!

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  10. Nice to have you back, Dave, and glad the latest 'Aggie and Shuggie' made you smile. We do our best.

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  11. I enjoyed reading this Jim. I suspect Aggie and Shuggie might end up with a blog of their own!

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  12. Joanna, I think they're best left as occasional treats besides I don't think I'm up to doing a regular blog.

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  13. Don't tell anyone but I play consecutive numbers in the Lottery (the odds are better for a stand-alone win... as if!) so I particularly enjoyed the little clip.

    The dialogue, as ever, sparkles.

    :)

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  14. Never played the Lottery, Ken, not even back at the start when there was still the novelty value. I'm not opposed to gambling as such but I was never brought up around gamblers and I find it hard to get excited over it.

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  15. Great again, Jim. I can see you writing a book of these Aggie and Shuggie's vignettes or stories or what-have-you on all sorts of subjects.

    I adore the drollery.

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  16. I don't think so, Conda, they're much more fun when one turns up out of the blue every now and then. And the next one's already brewing in my head.

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